No, not to bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme (although I do oft get myself confused with Mark Wahlberg, which can be awkward...). It is about time to blog.
It has been FOREVER! That means that this is likely to be the World's Longest Blog of the World (no, I have not lost my mind... I am more gently making fun of
this list!).
There are a couple events that need to have a blog all their own - Danielle's birthday, and my birthday. Both have pictures from multiple sources, which makes it more time-consuming to blog. And, I am still waiting for Danielle's pictures of my birthday to be put on facebook, so that puts a setback, too. SO there are those two blogs to look forward to, in addition to the ones that come from future things!
AND, I am pretty sure that there is a Sneaky Vulture Tricks Volume 4 on the way (Get excited! And if you haven't read them, it might be a good idea to read
Volume 1,
Volume 2, and
Volume 3!).
So, this is just going to be a snapshot of the coolest things I have done in the last six months - haha. We'll see how much I remember! Alright, here goes!
So we're starting with Paul's last night working at Decibel.
He had promised LL that he would motorboat her before he left. This terrified him intensely.
Here he is, holding Danielle's hand for moral support before he goes in....
And he finally dives in...
He did it!
But, he was unfortunately traumatized.
Not sure if it was the trauma, or just being too much to drink, but Paul had some seriously absurd quotes, to the point where we just took turns writing almost everything he said (well, pretty much yelled) into the dictuary.
They are as follows:
This one is in response to a text LL sent... "I am really 3 bedroom, 2 bath, 3 car garage attracted to you. In ground pool!"
On the subject of Harry Potter characters...
"Hermione is a 64 year old prosititute."
"Ron deals crack over there. On Brady and Farwell. He's like 'Oy Mate, I'm your friendly neighborhood crack dealer.'"
And a random one...
"I will fucking fuck you up in StratEgo. Or STRATego."
And to Danielle, when she said she was going to go home and go to sleep...
"But DeFran! Wake up your Dego ass!"
Some more randoms...
"Yes!! Is that a Chuck E. Cheese token?"
"You have no idea how good I am at ticket games."
"Hey. Way to be a feminine hygiene product." (about someone he thinks is a douchebag)
"I'm not a marry. Bride. Internet." (He meant mail-order bride. No idea why he was talking about that, though!)
Buddha was very amused, so this was one of his contributions... "When I laugh, I wheeze."
"You and your six four two ness!" (I believe this was about Danielle being... tall.)
"Is there a trash can still over there? If waste management has anything to do with it!!"
"Fuck pennies and cents. Who needs metallic forms of currency? Either its plastic or cotton. Watch the Discovery Channel once in awhile."
"Breasts?? They scare me." (Walks away quickly)
"I got re-cooters out there looking for me."
As you can see, he had many people laughing hysterically!
Yes, those are his tips on the floor. He made it rain.
He then made Buddha a drink. He didn't notice the gaping hole in the cup, however...
until much after, when he began singing "There's a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza..."
Then he put one of the cones on his nose...
"I look like the Wicked Witch of the Northeast!
Now I have a hook nose. Or (Name Deleted). Bitch is crazy!"
(Obviously, these were reactions to his whole nose cone thing)
And then these...
"I have the Asian curse!"
"Indiana Jones and the Fucking Temple of Mammaries."
And there you have it. Paul's dictuary quotes from his last night at Decibel....
But here he is with the "barroons" that he had from his surprise goodbye dinner before he left, that decorated Decibel.
On to another evening, when we had another of the famous theme nights.
This one was "Golf Pros and Tennis Hos."
Enjoy the photos...
The first is of Erin, Amber, Shawn and I at Jo Cat's. Unfortunately, Erin and Amber did not have time to dress up for the theme night. As you can see, Shawn and I did.
Here is photographic evidence that I am the luckiest woman in the world.
And, here is a group shot. Absurd!
Next picture is from a random night on which I (more or less) told a guy that his shirt looked like a dishtowel, and he then gave it to me. Here I am with said shirt....
I was right, wasn't I? Christian is going to make me a sexy skirt out of it... Someday.
There was a man there that night that looked like mini Reverend Al Sharpton Jr. I have seen him a few times since. He is always dressed to the nines. Here is a picture of him with Danielle. I am not sure what he is looking at. I am pretty tall....
Here's Streetz and I, on the very same night! That hat is in my back seat, from when he was in town and we hung out all day a few weeks ago. I should start wearing it around.
I really like those shoes! I hope he wears them again soon, so I can, too!
Next, we move up to Memorial Day... Wow. That was a long time ago. It's almost Thanksgiving! Lawd.
Anyway, on Memorial Day, we first went to a cookout at Jason and B-Skin's. I was cold, (I was kidding myself when I got dressed and put on a sundress, even though it was quite cold outside still), so I put on Brian's pants. The shoes just seemed logical, after that. I think he and I wear the same size, so it worked out really well.
After the cookout, we changed clothes and went to Apartment 720 for Fred and Favio's party... Here's a picture of LL and I with Erin and Hope.
Then Erin and Hope went to Decibel, and we met up with Danielle and Jamie at Cush. See?
Then, of course, we went to Decibel... And Streetz was there, and I wore his shoes... Same ol, same ol.
And next, we have LED belt buckle night. Here are Natron and Spencer... Hilarious!
Then, we move to the time that Paul and I drove up to Detroit to suprise his brother, who resembles Kenny Blankenship from MXC so much that I won't acknowledge his real name, on his birthday.
Here's a picture of the two of us with his "Happy Birthday, Kenny" cake from Coldstone... It was yummy, and we ate it in the club until it melted to an unrecognizeable pile of gross-looking deliciousness.
And here I am with two of the three brothers....
As you can see, this is all pretty much just looking at my pictures and throwing the most interesting ones in. I am relying on the order of the albums to give the order of the pictures in the blog... I'm doing my best! Oh, this is such a long blog!
So this next couple pictures is from a random Wednesday night when I had a ton to do for school (must've been late May or early June), and was going to go out for dinner at Botana's, and then go home...
Then one margarita turned into another, and I became the drunkest person in the United States, and decided to go to Bayou.
That was a treat for everyone involved... I finally got my can of Sex Drive that Rob had promised... Then LL and I decided to race to go downstairs, taking different routes. I beat her so bad that I decided to take a nap on her trunk whilst waiting for her. Here's a picture of that!
So then, of course, we went to Decibel, where we played bar dice. I obviously really needed to do that!
Fifty-six all day, bitches!
So a few days or weeks later, I get to Decibel, and Amber runs out and tells me that she has met the best basketball players in the world, Mike and Chris.
I knew right away that she was most likely talking about Mike Kinsella and Chris Grimm.
I was right!
So shortly after school was over, I took a trip to Vegas to see Asian Paul and to do a few shoots (over half of which got cancelled, grrr!).
At the mall in the Planet Hollywood mall, I met the love of my life. Oh man, he is very attractive! Our clothes matched (because we are a match made in heaven!), so we obviously needed to take a picture to document the momentous occasion and our love!
Don't you love his wand? I do too, if you know what I'm sayin'... =P
Next, of course, I had to take a picture rubbing Buddha's belly!
Vegas, as it usually is, was pretty much mostly a blur of drinking and gambling, with a bit of shopping, a shoot, and Cirque du Soleil thrown in. Here is some evidence of the gambling...
And some more....
Yeah, those are $5 chips. My comment was that that was enough money to keep me drunk at Decibel for two years. That may be true!
Again, in the Planet Hollywood mall, we were at some sports collectibles store, and I had to take this picture (in lieu of getting my picture taken with Lou Ferigno or however you spell his name!)...
I love it! My hands are a bit smaller than average, but damn! That is ridiculous! Ha, how weird.... Stay tuned for another hand size contrast image later!
One of the things on my agenda whilst in Vegas was to hear/experience some good djing, so on the Friday night, we went to Moon at the Palms to see DJ Stone Rokk. He was fantastic, and the venue was pretty sweet (but I still hate Vegas). Here is a view from the roof.
Apparently, people can Spy on Vegas. I guess what happens in Vegas, doesn't actually stay in Vegas, if you have access to the internet!
Oh no! People will now know that Paul and I DRANK in Vegas! I am sure that no one would've guessed that!!!
One thing that I was very excited about Vegas was seeing Ray Ray. It's always a treat, and she met us at Moon. Hey-oh!
Sexy sexy!
But wait! There's more!
Next day, we went to see Cirque du Soleil. It was truly one of the coolest things I had ever seen in my life, and when I later went to see a different show (le Reve in Vegas, Saltimbanco w/ Mamalicious in MKE), I was quite impressed with that one as well. I highly recommend it!
Here we are, outside of some fountain....
Next night, we went out to see DJ Graham Funke at the Playboy Club, also in the Palms. Ray Ray joined again, (YAY!), and we met up with some chick who had just won $50,000 playing Rock Paper Scissors in some competition on ESPN, and she was a Badger! Holla! Here we are....
And here's Ray Ray and I....
And again....
Here I am, triple fisting it.... Sometimes you just need more hands!
Here's Paul and I, both looking the same direction as the Playboy bunny head in the background.
Here are Ray Ray, Paul, and I, with our big ass smiles!
And here I am with DJ Graham Funke on the left, and DJ StoneRokk on the right. Stone looks like he is about to eat my face. GF looks a little concerned for my safety.
As often occurs, I made a new BFF. This time, it was GF's G-friend, Lalaine. You may recognize her as Lizzie McGuire's weird best friend, well, because that was who she apparently played on tv. She was awesome, and we got faded and had tons of fun!
Like I said, if you have access to the internet, what happens in Vegas definitely doesn't stay there!
Post Playboy Club (and, I will take this opportunity to state that I really want one of the Playboy Bunny costumes... I think I would look cute in a corset and with a tail!), we went to Planet Hollywood, where we were staying, and won a bunch of money and drank a lot at the same time. Evidence....
Yep, that's Paul with another $500 chip on his forehead. Pretty sweet! I love Pai Gow.
RayRay wasn't gambling, so much as drinking for free whilse we gambled. Here she is with her "three levels of drinks, like the Cingular bars!"
Pretty bru-tal, wouldn't you say? I love her badass expression. I also love the expression of the gentleman who is sitting at the table with us drunkards. Poor man must've been terrified!
Like I said, I did a shoot whilst in Vegas.... Here is my best edit from it. It's interesting....
So yeah....
After I got from Vegas, we had Danielle's birthday celebration, and like I said... That tale needs a blog all its own. It's quite intense!
Then the Mamalitia fundraiser in Racine took place. Danielle has a few pictures of that on her camera, but none of the amazing ones, so that event is going to remain unblogged. It was a great time, and as anyone would expect from Racine, it got pretty crazy, and there were a lot of bizarre characters.
You may be wondering... "Where are the amazing pictures of the Mamalitia fundraiser in Racine?"
Well, unfortunately, I am wondering that too. When I was in NYC, in the beginning of August, I either lost my camera, or it got stolen!!! There were a lot of amazing pictures one it, such as those from the fundraiser, and some really cool ones from in NYC! We'll get to that in a minute, though....
The end of July/beginning of August was intense. I am surprised I survived.
End of July, we moved from our old apartment to our new home. The night of the move actually ended up being the night before I left for NYC (intense day!) as well as the night that Decibel got filmed by E's Wild On.
Of course, my pictures from that night are lost, but fortunately, www.themilwaukeescene.com covered the event, so I've borrowed some of their shots. Here they are!
This first one is of "Andrea?" and Erin and I. The reason for the question mark is because I had hung out with Andrea a few times, and when I went to tag images of her on facebook, I couldn't remember for certain her name, so I tagged her as "Andrea?" so now I always just call her that. =P I'm Ron Burgundy?
Next up is Sensual Amber and I...
Then Sensual, Andrea? and I doing shots. Of course... We were very aware of the camera, and feeling a little silly about it!
Paul (DJ White Shadow) was there, so I had to say hi to him!
So that night, I was by far the drunkest person in the United States. I am sure that at this point, it is quite shocking!
Next morning, went to NYC. Spent some time with a friend, then started preparing for
this fashion show.After the show, we hung out with a couple of the employees of the club where the show was.
Here are some pictures of that...
Awww, LL looks so pretty!
I love my hair and makeup that night! I wish I could always have a professional makeup artist and hair stylist get me ready every day! Maybe that will happen once I am famous - haha.
Here are LL and I with our new friend, George. He's a model, too, and worked at the club where the fashion show took place.
The very next day, I shot with Sir William Lords at the Waldorf-Astoria.
He is an AWESOME photographer, and has been on "I want to work for Diddy" in the episode where they shoot the ad campaign for the Sean John eyewear.
The makeup artist that we worked with , Todd Homme, is currently on the reality show about makeup artists, Blush.
Without further ado, here's the shot I got!
Yeah, I am pretty proud of that one. My training for the three day was paying off a bit at that time, methinks!
Right after that, we all went to the CILA awards, which took place in a ballroom at the Waldorf-Astoria. At the cocktail hour, a friend and I kept singing "She's your queeeeeen to beeeee," since we were at the same hotel that was featured in one of my favorite movies, Coming to America.
Carson Kressly was there, you know, from Queer Eye? LL and I got our pictures taken with him, but of course, as you know, the camera is gone, and thusly, so are the pictures! Damn.
Until we meet again, Carson....
Next day, everyone left, and I stayed with a friend. That was quite the adventure, and was when the camera got lost. Bru-talities.
Shortly after I got back from NYC was the wife-beater bar crawl. I don't remember what was at Decibel the night before, but here is a picture that I toook of Khary, dancing shirtless in the DJ booth (obviously).
I didn't take many pictures on the wife beater bar crawl. I was very hung over at the beginning (playing flippy cup with water - haha). And, I was without my partner in crime, LL. So I was a shell of a woman. Haha. I did take this picture of Troy, though, which is pretty spectacular...
And, much like last year, the wifebeater bar crawl, we have come full circle. Remember how I met Alleged Marcus? He was at MJ's, and claimed to work at Decibel. Well, here he is at MJ's again!
Khary showed up a bit late (must've felt a little bru-tal after dancing shirtless in the dj booth), and of course, bought a shot or two.... Or twenty... A few times!
The last stop of the pubcrawl was DeepBar. And, of course, there was a thumbwar championship... Here is Khary with Jeff, of course, playing thumb war!
That is the last image I have, but I DO have another video.... Thank goodness for Troy! Here's
the video in question. Please note the part when Troy says "Mandie sucks!" and then I get it on my first try! Hey-oh!
Moving on....
As I would think most know, the 105th Anniversary celebration for Harley Davidson was here in MKE in August. It was crazy! Bikes all over...
Of course, there was a North Ave block party, with a Harley Fashion Show at Decibel
(video here).
Here's a picture of Andrea?, blonde John, Erin, and I.
Fast forward to September 2nd... Spencer's birthday, two days before mine.
He got a couple bottles of Ace of Spades (delicious!)... Here we are, enjoying it!
Yeah, I know it is a crappy picture of a toast, but hey.... I was toasting at the same time!
Of course, Parker and Natron had to bust out some fake moustaches for the occasion.
Don't they look fantastic?
Next time I turned around, there was a change in facial hair... From the creepy cop moustache to the cute little beard you see below.
Now, at some poiint, prior to his birthday, either I licked Spencer's face, or he licked my face. I don't truly recall how this started, but it became known that we were going to lick each other's faces on his birthday. So, I went first....
And Spencer went second.
OH, silliness.
At some point shortly after, there was a prettycity.com website launch.
RayRay came to town, and we went out with Jen and Jamie. Here we four ladies are!
On this random Tuesday night, there was another guest to Decibel.
That would be Dalip Singh. He is some kind of wrestler. He was also the big guy in the movie The Longest Yard.
Remember earlier in this very same blog, when I had my hands in Shaquille's handprints, and I said that there would be another hand size comparison.... Well, here it is!
Good Lawd, that is a big man, and a big hand.
So, RayRay and I tried to get a picture with him. His friend or handler or whoever he was was very difficult to deal with. Apparently, the big man was hard to deal with, too, as RayRay complained that he kept fondling her. Eww.
Anyway, this handler dude kept trying to tell me to tell his big friend that I really liked him in the Longest Yard. He did not care about the fact that I had never seen such a movie, except for the Burt Reynolds one or whatever.
I think my non-compliance led to his. I kept asking him to take a picture vertically, but he would not do so. Sooooo, this is what we got.
And this....
Pretty sweet, eh? Ugh....
And then, moving on again, we have Erin's birfday celebration.
We all got together at a neighborhood bar called Pitch's. Here we are!
Moving on again (could this blog be any more random? I really should do these things right away, like I said I was going to with the New Year's resolution.... Fiff.).
So, on some random night out, LL and I both wore strapless bras. I don't know if you ever noticed, but LL has much larger breasts than I do. Weird, huh?
Anyway, here I am wearing her bra, outside of my dress. We are pretty close to the same size, wouldn't you say?
Here is the size comparison....
Whoah. Somewhere, there is a picture of LL "wearing" mine, but I don't know what happened to it, and it is a HUGE pain to add a picture to the middle of a blog (especially one this long!), so I just decided not to do it. Use your imagination, ok?
Moving on, to a random night at Cush... The twins were pretty goofy, so we took some pictures!
They were wrestling, like little kids!
And, shortly after that, was my birthday celebration. It was combined with Paul (White Shadow)'s party. Like I said, once Danielle gets those pics on facebook, this event will get its own blog, but for now, here's a picture of a few of us celebrants.
And a picture of me, looking absurd. LL and Danielle say they enjoy this picture, so I threw it in for good measure.
Moving on (ha, these must be the key words of this blog) to another random night, after LL did a retro shoot. Here we are with Streetz in the dj booth.
Yeah, that's the getup I was wearing when I met my new neighbors. They must've been impressed, especially by that chain. Lawd.
So then I took a picture with Drew.
And here I am with Drew and JJ, being (once again!), one of the luckiest women in the world!
MOVING ON... (haha)
Next was Maj's birthday party. Of COURSE, we needed to do a shot of Jam-o. Here it is!
And, also of course, we needed to take a picture with Erin.
You see, although this was back in September, I remember distinctly that Erin asked for this picture to be taken. It made me feel good, because one thing I am insecure about is that people think I am nuts or annoying that I always want to take pictures and stuff. I don't know. I was glad that someone other than me asked for a picture. Thank you, Erin!
Rich and Favio then showed up, so we took a picture and a shot. Here it is!
DJ Brian B'Zar was playing "Maniac" from the soundtrack of Flashdance, so Rich and Favio HAD to do the appropriate dance!
Shortly after that, I went to a wedding with Curti. Since both the bride and groom were UW Madison Alumni, Bucky was at the wedding. SO, I took a picture with him.
If you're wondering why I looked so weird, it's because Bucky kinda headbutted me! It was crazy!
Here's Curti and I at the wedding!
And, here is a picture of Refugio.... Isn't he adorable? Cutest cat in the world.
And, some time later, DJ Sye Young was in town, so here we all are!
Twice before in this blog, I have been the luckiest woman in the Universe. Here we are making Carl the luckiest man!
The next morning, ten of us went to Great America for the Kohl's friends and family day. Here's our group shot in the parking lot.
Obviously, Joe and John had to hit up the gift shop immediately to buy a ridiculous chain, and a fanny pack. Here they are, showing off the pride in their purchases!
Next up, I decided to try a new challenge - taking pictures on a roller coaster! Here's what I got... Check out Maj and Blake!
Why is sheer terror so funny sometimes?
Another mini group shot....
Erin's tongue was orange!
This one cracks me up, too!
Here is a picture of the evolution of the fanny pack....
On the right is the obvious chapstick on the caribeaner (or however you spell it!). On the left is Tom, a wiggle. I think it was called a wiggle. It was Shawn's pet. Haha.
Maj and I played some carnival games, and won some awesome pillows. The fabric felt so gross!
More action shots....
Good times! In the last couple above, they were supposed to look like they were praying for their safety - haha.
Next up is a picture I took whilst in traffic on my way home from work.
Yes, that's "Balloons on the Ave," a balloon store, barber shop, and beauty salon. It's kinda tough to see, but it says "Glamourish" on the window, and they advertise that they give you free hair. Hilarious. I don't know what I think about that kind of a combination!
For my mom's birthday, I took her to see Saltimbanco, the Cirque du Soleil show that came to Milwaukee.
After, we went to Cush and played some trivia. This is where Mamalicious got a new nickname - "Mammy!"
Of course, this had a hand motion. AND, of course, we dominated.
Here is a picture of us with our celebratory hand motion....
MAMMY!
Shortly after this was JJ's beardthday.
JJ always has a beard, so the idea was that we would all wear fake beards to the Jackalope Lounj. Here are some silly photos of that!
Drew asked me to braid his, so here we have it!
Hysterical. Here he is with Nate!
Yet another picture of my cute ass cat.... This time, with Danielle. He looks so big!
Moving on (how absurd)...
It was time for the yearly trip to Madison for the Badger game!
I was STRUGGLING that morning. Khary's birthday was the night before, and I was definitely still feeling the effects in the morning. I also thought that I was getting a cold from being so busy and not resting enough... So, on my way, I popped into a McDonald's and bought some orange juice. About secen hundred gallons of orange juice.
That was a poor choice. Orange juice in, orange juice out. Brutal.
Cari and Matt had already started pre-drinking before I had gotten there, and got me back in the game after just a little bit of prodding.... Ok, a lot of prodding.
When we got to Camp Randall, I was cold (forgot my sweatshirt in the hotel room), so I went to buy a sweatshirt. The Prince bought another hat.
Meanwhile, Cari thought it would be a good idea to take a nap. On a bench.
So, we woke her up. Notice the surplus of hats in this situation!
And, here's a picture of us at the game. I don't think a more unflattering picture could be found. check out all of our chins!
Trying again?
Then Matt went to the bathroom and to get me some peanut M&M's, so Cari and I took a picture together ourselves.
Well, they didn't have peanut M&M's, so the prince thought he would buy every other type of candy in the stadium. Here are Cari, Matt, and the candy. (And you wonder why I thought that he was a prince?)
One of the many traditions of the student section is wiggling keys at kickoff. Well, as Matt said, "We got room keys!"
This is his contribution to that tradition!
Here's a picture of the cute couple...
During the weekend, Cari repeatedly made comments to Matt about how she wanted to be engaged. She even hit him a few times about it!
I was convinced that this was an ineffective plan of attack. If I was considering proposing to someone, and they hit me a whole bunch, I don't think I would want to. Just sayin'.
I was wrong! They got engaged last Friday, as did Alison and her fiance Jesse! Cute!
Here are the three of us, during fifth quarter!
Much like me in the morning, Cari was difficult to rouse after the post-game nap. Here's Matt's effort.
We finally made it out. To Wando's, which Matt kept calling "Curti's Bar."
It was quite amusing. =)
After about a million hours of being drunk, I was hungry. Jimmy John's it was. Apparently, when I got in the non-moving car to start eating my sub, I buckled up. Hey, safety is important. Here is the picture that Cari took to commemorate this absurdity.
A few days later, more trivia at Cush. Here are Rob and I... He looks pretty cute witht hat scarf on, doesn't he?
Moving on, to Halloween.
LL bought Refugio a Halloween costume. He was a devil!
Kelly was a mouse... Danielle was goth. She looks like a female Mesh!
LL was Betty Boop, and I was Jessica Rabbit. Bill was Bill.
Yeah, I wasn't very good at figuring out how to get that ridiculous wig to cover only part of my face. Soo..... Re-do!
As you can see, Rob was Rob. It would've been funny if he had been Bill.
And, here I am with Lil Wayne!
Finally, LL, Danielle, and I are reunited. Yes, it did feel so good.
JC and Spencer dressed up as each other! Brilliant!
And here we have Dee Snyder from Twisted Sister! Amazing costume, don't you think?
Any picture of LL with Danielle on her bosom is a good picture in my book!
And, since Streetz was the DJ on Halloween night, you know that this had to happen!
And here I am with the man himself!
Finally, we come to a couple weekends ago.... First, we have the Suns-Bucks game.
And, the very next day, the Beastie Boys concert. What an awesome weekend!
Let me just say that the Beastie Boys concert was amazing.
Ok. I am seriously sick of blogging. I need food. I promise that the next blog will be fewer than three months from now!
